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After Hot A10 Start, Bonnies Play Richmond's Second Team at VCU

For the third time in school history, the Bonnies are 4-0 in A10 play. Sure, some haters and losers will say we played 4 of the bottom 7 teams. We pretty much rolled all of them, while certain teams that "so-called" experts say are better than us went to OT at home with Fordham and UMass-Amherst.

The Brown and White have to be careful about this upcoming trap game before a huge road game against literal NBA team Dayton. On Saturday, Bona's plays against the 7th best team in the conference: a middling .500 Virginia Communion University squad on the road. The Johnny-come-latelys who root for Richmond's second team will probably be out in full force in the Steven Seagal Center. They might even sell the place out for once.

Like UMass-Amherst, Virginia Commodore University also has an alleged Final Four with an asterisk on it. Jay Bilas, who has never been wrong about anything ever, said VCU did not deserve to make the tournament in 2011 and he was right. Just because they went to the Final Four doesn't mean they deserved to be there in the first place. It's like how just because I won 10,000 tickets playing Skeeball at Chuck E. Cheese doesn't mean I belonged there, since my resume consisted of huffing paint in the parking lot beforehand.

Flex on 'em, zaddy!

I've said it before, but many Virginia Concave University fans forget that basketball was not invented in 2011. VCU has never been past the Round of 32 other than that one year. That's the same as George Mason. VCU is just GMU with fans that lead the nation in Funko Pop! dolls.

Good luck finding one of these at Velocity Comics on Broad Street.

Ah yes, the fans of Virginia Cormorant University. If you're reading this, there's a very good chance that you've dealt with one or are one. If you are a VCU fan, you're already furiously typing a 15-tweet thread at SBUnfurled, even though he's not writing this. "I don't collect Funkos! I make my own Big Bang Theory figurines on Etsy!"

There's nothing wrong with wearing some different stuff beyond your typical team t-shirt and jeans, unless you do the Mitt Romney with a collared shirt-over-the-jersey combo. Plenty of fan sections have some costumes, masks and outfits, but there's just this certain je ne sais fuckoff about the aesthetic of VCU fans. I've seen overalls (from a school not exactly in a rural area), tutus, and whatever caped crusader Pav is trying to be. I mean, the coolest thing VCU fans have ever done was literally be cops.

This was objectively great, though.

I could go on about the inability of Virginia Contemporaneous University fans to take a joke, but #A10Twitter is chock full of tweets calling them clowns, accounts that need to be muted, or the people who invented the Pete Buttigieg "High Hopes" dance. Let's get to this game's interview. I really wanted to actually interview a VCU fan for this one to possibly calm down the Twitter tensions that pop up every year. Or maybe this will throw gas on that fire. Who knows? Playing fast and loose, baby!

Mat Shelton-Eide is one of the few Virginia Constantinople University fans that not only followed the Evilest Rams when they were in the CAA, but even in the Sun Belt. That's right, Virginia Carbonara University was once in the Sun Belt. I had no idea. Shelton-Eide is in charge of, which is their largest fan site. He says despite Twitter noise, the average VCU fan isn't too concerned about the Brown and White.

I think VCU and Bona's limited history that has included limited key games since VCU has been in the A-10 -- no tourney matchups, no major losses -- has had the Bonnies an under-the-radar team for your regular VCU fan in the post Final 4 era for us, but I think the die hards who are paying attention think of the Bonnies as a consistently tough team that is very well-coached. I think Ram fans that are paying attention think of St. Bonaventure fans as a passionate group of beer-drinking fun lovers. I do at least.

He also says Virginia Cicrcumnavigate University may have something in common with another group of those who love Blue Light since joining the A10 six years ago.

Obviously fewer tourney titles than we would've liked (it feels like we're the A-10's 1990s Buffalo Bills), but overall just a ton of success. The A-10 has certainly made punching a dance ticket easier -- 5 at-large bids since joining compared to just one in our history before that -- and overall it's just helped elevate the Rams' profile.

But Shelton-Eide unfortunately learned the hard way that sometimes, Virginia Cannibalism University fans eat their own.

Back when I was on Twitter with a personal account, I probably got attacked more by VCU fans than any other fanbase, so it's not just a VCU/Bona or VCU/Dayton thing, it's insane VCU fan versus anyone who says anything that's not 100% approved by random Twitter Ram fan. No clue why or when Ram fans turned like that, but I think it likely has to do with so many new fans who have experienced nothing but success and I guess have some weird entitlement issues because of it.

That's why when you put those three magic letters together, you may find Tomi from VCU outside your window, lecturing you about Brett Kavanaugh's innocence and how all lives matter.

There are a TON of amazing people in the fanbase we call Ram Nation, but for some reason a disproportionate amount of the insane ones happen to be the most interested in searching all things VCU on Twitter. I guess that's the good and the bad of having some success and building a large fanbase. That passion is great during the games, but can sometimes suck in the down time.

Shelton-Eide also says, unlike some fans who would never be caught dead in where they call the Hinterlands (apparently that's a World of Warcraft reference, I warned you about them...), he'd like to see in-person what makes Bona's so special. He also crossed party lines a few years ago to unify our factions.

Two years ago I recruited Dion Wright to play for my TBT team ("Ram Nation") because I just respected his game so much when he was our opponent. He had never met me, but agreed to come hoop with us, so I flew him into Richmond and hung out with him there for a couple of games, then down to Atlanta for our two games down there. He's one of the nicest guys I've ever dealt with in hoops and I still stay in touch with him today. So while I will always root for VCU over Bona, I got a little love for St. Bonaventure hoops myself.

By the way, Dion has committed to our TBT team that's expected to debut this summer!

Seven Steps to Victory

  1. Santos-Silva from the free throw line is almost as bad as Ben Simmons shooting 3s.

  2. Bones Hyland is basically the only one shooting well for them right now, so shut him down because Bones are their money.

  3. Mike Rhoades's father was a Republican politician, so VCU could win in the Electoral College, even if we score 3 million more points than them.

  4. Disguise a Bona fan in VCU clothes courtside, bump into a ref with .4 seconds remaining and bail us out if we're going to lose.

  5. History-making Virginia delegate Danica Roem went to Bonaventure, so Bonnies know quite a bit about succeeding in the state capital.

  6. Several members of heavy metal bands GWAR and Lamb of God went to VCU. Expect Schmidt to unleash our Megadeth defense, folks.

  7. If we can pull this one off, VCU might be waving bye-bye to their chances of catching us in the A10 standings.

The last time we were at VCU. 👋👋👋

BonaCommenter's Score on #a102k20: Bona's 83, Virginia Chionablepsia University 73

Unrealistic 2k Stat of the Game: Welch shot 0-10 from 3. Yeah, if he does that on Saturday, we aren't winning...

Bonnies Forum Quote of the Day: "We all love Bona's, but we can also all admit it's not exactly the most difficult school to get accepted to, nor does it exactly require that you be a Rhodes Scholar to make it through to your degree. With that in mind, a guy in my class failed out of Bona's and was accepted into VCU the next semester. Enough said." Message Board Quote of the Day: [during A10s last year] "Took my brother over to King's Beer Hall telling him that this is the Rams HQ. Bonnies fans spilling out the door. They took the place over in our absence. I shook my head, turned around, and had to head back out the door. Nail in the coffin."

I think it's time for back-to-back road wins against Virginia Coprophagous University.










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